Thursday, June 02, 2005

Next Up, Injectible IUI #3

Besides the obvious, one reason I dislike progesterone suppositories is that it forces me to wait even longer before moving on. When not using the lovely abdominal cramp-inducing medication, at least my big day of disappointment coincides with the start of a new cycle (for as I mentioned previously, I’m not a frequent pee-on-a-stick kind of girl). But now I’m forced to wallow in the failure of the last cycle without the distraction of what’s going on in with my new cycle.

And I keep thinking shouldn’t I just move on to IVF? Why will a third injectible IUI cycle produce any different results? But our plan has always been to do 3 cycles before proceeding (does having this as a plan ahead of time mean I was destined to go through 3 cycles?); it was something that D felt strongly about so I acquiesced.

What’s really strange about it all is that D is not dying to be a father. He’s certainly come to accept the idea, but if I went home and told him that I’ve decided I didn’t want us to have kids he’d be pretty happy. Hence, when we started ttc it was clearly “my project.” He didn’t want to know anything about my temperatures or cervical fluid or what certain books said we should do in the three months before we began trying (despite the fact that I highlighted and tabbed certain sections for him to read in Before Your Pregnancy). Then last December, when I was in one of my really bad bouts of infertile depression, I told him that I wanted to start looking into adoption. He said we should try IVF first, and it blew me away.

We’re both pretty practical people, particularly when it comes to money. Before I started the injectibles I thought I’d skip IVF and the 50% chance of having a biological child for spending the same amount of money and the 99% chance of having any child. But D, who I know is terrified at the prospect of becoming a parent at all, wants to explore all our options of having a biological child. And given that it’s his salary that provides us with the luxury of being able to afford trying the various options, I think it’s only fair to go see them all through. So next up is bravelle-IUI #3.

I’ve just started feeling those premenstrual cramps, so it looks like CD 1 will be here soon.

9 Comments:

Blogger K said...

I'm so sorry to hear about the negative, here's hoping that the third time is a charm.

June 02, 2005 2:57 PM  
Blogger Larisa said...

Here's hoping that the 3rd IUI with Injectables is the charm. That's quite a mouthful. My dh is kind of the same way...he could give up on this baby thing and be pretty happy I think. But I think he would definitely want us to explore all options first.

I hope you don't make it to IVF.

June 02, 2005 3:23 PM  
Anonymous P. said...

I hope that today or tomorrow ends up being CD1 and that you can get started on a fresh cycle.

I am the opposite of you, Husband wants kids as much if not more than I do. Plus, he is five years older than me and has a complex about being an "old" father...

June 02, 2005 3:29 PM  
Blogger penelope said...

assvice warning:

I did 7 IUIs - at least 3 injectibles and they all sucked big goose eggs. I'm in the middle of my first IVF and frankly only one part was worse than the IUI (the egg retrieval) - doing an IUI w/injectibles is almost (like 80%) of the pain and agony as IVF from my perspective. Ultrasounds, shots, etc. BUT the 2 week wait with IVF has actually for the first time ever given me some hope. Part of the reason I'm saying all of this is because I see you live in MAss. where IVF is covered by insurance. According to my RE if IUI doesn't work in the first 3 or so tries the chances of it working just go down and down, we were at something like a 3% chance of getting pregnant by #7.

Sorry this isn't addressing the other issues in your post but I'm a pretty peeved IUI veteran.

my apologies for the rant - and you know what else? I'll take PIO shots over those disgusting suppositories any day - really, they're not nearly as painful as the subcutaneous shots.

June 02, 2005 4:01 PM  
Blogger Mellie said...

Penelope -
I totally hear what you're saying. And I think that's why I'm feeling rather prepared for the next step of IUI. Unfortunately I'm living in Manhattan (I was born in Massachusetts and thus am a Red Sox fan) so IVF isn't covered. I've thought about moving home and going on my Dad's insurance though!

June 02, 2005 4:18 PM  
Blogger Susie said...

I hope the third time is the lucky one, Mellie.

I have been fortunate with IUI (got pregnant both times, though the first time I miscarried and this one is very early days yet). One good thing is that from doing IUI, they should have a better idea of how you stim. So maybe if you do have to make the transition to IVF, these cycles will have done some good.

My fingers are crossed for you.

susie
notahabit

June 02, 2005 10:45 PM  
Blogger Mony said...

I admire you for sticking with the plan....3 tries before moving on to IVF. Sometimes it's so hard to live with the decisions you originally made. Not to mention the drag of beating a path you already lucked out on twice before. It must be so trying.
You know, IVF may never be needed...I certainly hope you get a delicious result with No 3 IUI. You sure as hell deserve a break sista.

June 03, 2005 3:47 AM  
Blogger Dramalish said...

Mellie
GOOD LUCK GIRL. I think 3 IUI's is a very solid plan.
I'm going on my fourth, and both the RE and the sperm bank told me that 6-8 inseminations is not uncommon before success.
I know donor sperm is a bit of a different situation, but there are women out there who definitely do get pregnant after several IUI's.

If your insurance is covering the meds for IUI's, but not for IVF (*this is our situation), it can't really hurt to give them a fighting chance.

I'm hoping this is it for you, though. Hope, hope, hope!!
-D.

June 03, 2005 1:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

New reader here... Hope you bleed soon, and can move to the next cycle... I'm in the same boat... not sure if we should do 2 more IUIs or move to IVF... but like you, I'd love a call from the governor, pardoning us from the execution.
Korin
www.livejournal.com/users/chiromama

June 03, 2005 3:28 PM  

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