Thursday, November 17, 2005

So Far

You’re all so good to come back and check up on me even though I don’t deserve your attention. It still amazes me how much a sense of community and friendship exists in the blogosphere amongst the infertiles of the world. I’m honored to be a small part.

So, here’s my latest:

On 11/4 D and I sat down with my RE and confirmed that we do indeed want to proceed to the next step, IVF. I don’t want to begin, however, until January 1 since that is when I will be covered under D’s insurance, which covers 80% of IVF costs. (I went with D to his company’s “health insurance fair” where we visited each of the tables representing the various plans available. I’d saunter up to each representative and ask “what coverage do you have for IVF?” Interestingly, it was the male rep at BCBS who knew immediately what I was talking about – not the women at Aetna. The male rep explained how he and his wife went through it themselves, but ended up adopting – and he proceeded to show us a picture of his young daughter. Clearly another instance of infertility being everywhere if you’re looking for it.) We briefly talked about protocol – probably a combo of bravelle and repronex and he mentioned that I would go on lupron. I asked him what he’d say my chances of success were (expecting a 48 – 50% number) and he answered 60%. Sixty percent!!! I was shocked, but didn’t ask why he gave such a high number because, really, I want to believe in the 60% chance. I don’t want to think about why it won’t work.

I’m signed up to take the info class on Dec. 20th and I went in last Friday for the mock transfer and sounding. Of course, everything was normal so it’s all systems go for IVF in the new year. I’m excited and anxious and hopeful and scared. Not scared of the actual procedures or the drugs or the doing of it. I’m just scared of failure.

The exterminator came to our apartment this morning to do his spraying thing (I swear, we don’t keep a dirty apartment – it’s de rigueur for city living!) and as he was leaving he said “Nice place. Just you and your husband?” And I replied “So far.” For some reason, I can’t bring myself to answer such questions with just a “Yes.”